


Star-Crossed

by orphan_account



Series: 1,000 Followers Prompts [12]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe-Non Magic, Blind Character, First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Tarot Card Reader Remus, Tarot Card Readings, Trans Sirius, blind Remus, mentions of misgendering, mentions of transphobia, palmistry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-17
Updated: 2016-03-17
Packaged: 2018-05-27 08:24:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6276943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Lily talks Sirius into a tarot card reading, at best he's expecting nothing.  He certainly didn't expect the cutest bloke he's ever seen.  And he certainly didn't expect to get all the answers--even ones he hadn't realised he was looking for.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Star-Crossed

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



> Written for queerasfucklupin's prompt- for the fic request i was thinking i'd love to read a modern au with trans!remus as a tarot reader who sirius gets a reading from. something along those lines?
> 
> I've only had one tarot reading done in my life and that was about 12 years ago so I remember very little of it. I also have no experience with palmistry. I spent about two hours last night researching tarot and palmistry online and did the best as I could to convey what I learnt into this fic. Normally Sirius likely would have had a more in-depth reading. But mostly I just wanted to encapsulate the fluff between them because it's wolfstar and we already have enough angst.

Sirius shifted from one foot to the other, staring hard at the worn little open sign in the foggy window. There were curtains made out of a bright orange fabric hanging, and it looked like the place hadn’t been given a proper once-over in months. Maybe years. Maybe ever.

There was a hand-carved sign hanging just in the window that read the word Moony’s, and under that was sellotaped a bit of paper from a computer printer which read palmistry and tarot. He almost laughed. He expected something…

No. That’s not true. He didn’t know what he expected. He certainly never expected to be stood outside the door of a bloody psychic— “It’s not a psychic, Sirius,” Lily had corrected him, but he couldn’t get that out of his head because who even did things like this?

He had an appointment, one he was running five minutes late for, and his aristocratic upbringing was making his skin positively itch at the thought of being late for anything. He could hear the crack of a wooden staff hitting the backs of his hands which would have happened had he been younger. Or maybe if his mother had anything to do with this.

Dragging a hand back through his hair, Sirius let out a long, loud sigh and reached for the handle, then backed up. Then reached again. Then backed up.

“Stop being such a fucking coward, Black. It’s not like they’re going to predict your fiery end.”

Though what if they did?

Lily ensured him this wasn’t some sort of Patrick Swayze Ghost situation where a hoaky psychic was going to be possessed and throw clay pots or something. Or predict death. There would be no tiny demon things dragging souls to hell.

“You want someone to help you make a decision, and trust me, this place is the best. It’s not going to tell you what to do, the reading is going to lay it all out for you and put you on the right path. It will affirm what you’ve got going on in your head.”

Bugger Lily and her logic.

Even if her logic was a little hoaky.

He straightened his back as he had been taught to do—unconscious habit as consciously he was trying to slouch so no one would know he once had to learn to sit with a rod up the back of his shirt—and he opened the door.

He’d seen all sorts of these things on the telly. He expected crystal balls and funky incense and…other stuff.

He certainly didn’t expect a young woman behind a small desk with a computer, holding a very tiny infant cradled in the crook of her arm. She had violently pink hair worn floppy on the top, with a severe undercut, and an impressively large septum piercing. She gave him a friendly smile as she shifted the sleeping babe.

“Hi there.”

“I erm. Have an appointment and I um…”

“No worries,” she said. She waved her free hand at a door, and Sirius took a moment to marvel that this place actually reminded him a bit of the therapist office the Potters had sent him to after he’d been thrown out. There were friendly, cheerful looking art prints hanging on the walls, a bookshelf with loads of books and a few hanging plants, and a sofa for waiting customers tucked right under the foggy window. “Go on in. He’s all set up.”

Sirius nodded, swallowing though it got caught in his throat and it clicked a bit as he forced it down. He cleared his throat then and tugged on the door handle.

The room beyond was just as similar as the office—in the way that it was unexpected. There was a round table in the centre, but certainly no crystal balls or weird, mysterious music, or funky smelling candles. The light came from a few shaded lamps, and the décor was minimalist—if you wanted to call it that. It was really a fancy way of saying there wasn’t anything put up at all.

The only notable thing in the room besides the bloke sat at the table already, was a massive fountain in the corner. It was set up with water flowing over rocks, into a small pool, and the sound was actually quite soothing.

“Hi. Sorry I’m late.” Sirius took a moment to focus on the psychic. Or tarot reader. Or whatever. He couldn’t remember what Lily had called him. He was too nervous to take in much more than the fact that he had a mop of dark-tawny curls, a large nose, slight overbite which stuck out over his bottom lip as he smiled.

“It’s perfectly fine.” The accent was different. Almost Welsh, but Sirius hadn’t travelled much outside of London and Bangkok—all of course at the direction of his mother who now…

Well.

That’s why he was here.

“Shall I erm…” He noticed this person wasn’t making eye contact, his gaze kind of fixated on what looked like a deck of extra large, extra thick playing cards sat face down.

“Go on and sit next to me. I’m Remus, by the way. You were recommended, yes?”

“By erm Lily. Potter? Redhead.”

Remus’ smile widened a bit. “Yes, Lily. We used to work together.”

Sirius blinked. “You…at the restaurant?”

Remus chuckled as Sirius pulled the chair back that was next to Remus’, and he nodded, still not looking up. “Ages ago, of course. Long before she was Dr Potter.”

Sirius let out a tiny snort of mirth at the thought of Lily Evans now Dr Potter. Not that he hadn’t seen it coming. She’d been bloody brilliant always. But maybe just a bit at the fact that she’d actually married James and actually tolerated Sirius. “Right. Those were the days, eh?” Sirius shifted uncomfortably in his seat and cleared his throat so loud, it startled the man beside him. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Remus said with a wide grin. “You sound nervous.”

“Ah. Well. I just…” He cleared his throat again. “I dunno how to say this without coming across as rude.”

“You don’t put a lot of stock into these things,” Remus said for him.

Sirius felt his face heat up a little. “I mean, it’s not that I don’t respect your erm. Practise. And I trust Lily’s opinion more than I trust my own. It’s just…it seems…”

“I think,” Remus said, shifting toward Sirius a bit and finally looking up, “you’re reading a little too much into what it might be.”

Sirius was startled by the sharp amber colour of his eyes as they glanced up. “Ah. Right. That must be erm. Must be it.”

Remus chuckled again. “Listen, I’m not here to predict your future or speak to the dead. I’m here to give you clarity.” He turned away, reaching down to the floor for something, and Sirius watched him pour something out of a dark brown bottle into his hands. Remus rubbed it in, massaging along his fingers for a moment, and there was the earthy smell of lavender and something else.

“Well that’s what I’m hoping to get out of this, mate,” Sirius replied in a slight murmur.

Remus’ grin didn’t falter as he held his hand out expectantly. When Sirius didn’t move, Remus laughed. “Your hand. To read your palm.”

“Oh. Right. Er.” Sirius placed the back of his hand over Remus’ palm, and startled when Remus brought his fingers down into the centre of Sirius’. He began to stroke along his fingers, and along the heel of his palm in a gesture so intimate it made Sirius yank his hand back. “What are you doing?”

“Reading your lines,” Remus said. “I just need to get a feel of…”

“I thought you’d just you know…look at the lines and erm…” Sirius swallowed. He had always been a bit iffy with extended touching—the only exception ever was James who had given him his first proper hug. But often times contact was overwhelming for the severely touch-starved man.

“Well traditionally yes,” Remus said very slowly, still holding his hand out for Sirius to return his own, “but being that I’m blind I need to do this a little bit differently.”

Sirius blinked. “Oh. I…oh. Um.”

“Lily didn’t mention,” Remus said, not quite a question. “I apologise. I normally give an opening speech to my first-time clients about the way I do things but Lily insisted she would have you filled in.”

“Ah. Well you know with her job and the sprog I think she forgets,” Sirius said. He glanced at Remus’ palm again, then slowly put his hand back.

“Listen, if this makes you uncomfortable, we can go straight to the cards,” Remus said.

“It doesn’t.”

Remus pressed the pad of his thumb right into the tight tendons in Sirius’ wrist. “This tells me you are very uncomfortable.”

Sirius blinked, feeling his eyes get hot suddenly, and he took a breath. “It’s…I’m not used to being touched. But you’re not bothering me. I promise.”

Remus licked his lips, then nodded. “Alright, but if at any time this is too much, just say the word and we stop. You’re under no obligations here. This is for your benefit only.”

Sirius felt his shoulders relax a fraction just at those words. Remus was not some person trying to exploit him, to hurt him. This was for him. And this was his job.

“I’m good.”

Remus let his eyes slip shut at that, and carefully he used his free hand to explore Sirius’. “Now, I can’t delve into too much detail about this. I can’t pick out some of the more intricate palmistry patterns because my fingers can only tell me so much. But you have very deep lines, here. Easy to read. We can keep it simple if you like.”

“Just,” Sirius said, trying not to feel overwhelmed by the softness or heat of Remus’ fingers. “Just…am I alright?”

Remus let out a small chuckle as he pressed the flat of his palm against Sirius’. “Yes. You’re quite alright. You’ve got a good head on your shoulders, Sirius. From what I can see here, you’re just fine.”

“That’s…that’s it?” Sirius asked.

Remus’ brow dipped. “I get the impression you don’t want me to go too deep into who you are.”

“But you _can_ tell?” Sirius asked.

“I can. A bit.”

“Then, well. No. I’ll trust that you would tell me if there was something I needed to know.”

Sirius’ breath hitched a bit—he hoped to god it was mostly silent—when Remus rubbed his palm up and down Sirius’ for a few moments. The gesture was more than soothing, and Sirius found himself craving the touch a bit more as Remus moved away.

“Alright. The next bit is what you’re here for. There’s a deck of cards in the middle of the table. What I want you to do is clear your mind as best you can. When you’ve got everything but the question you want the answer to, pick up the deck and give it a good shuffle.”

“Do you want to erm…pick it up or…?”

“No. It’s much better if I don’t cloud the reading by touching it first,” Remus said. “Go on, it’s fine.”

With slightly trembling fingers, Sirius started to reach across the table, but stopped as he remembered he had to clear his mind first. He let his eyes slip closed and focused on his one question. The only one that mattered. He swallowed and felt a calm settling over him. His question floated round his mind then he reached out and put his hand on the top of the deck.

He wasn’t sure what to expect. The feeling of…magic? Maybe? Tingling or…some indication that these cards held the key to unlocking his head. The key to unlocking his paralysis when it came to making this decision. Never in his life had he ever been so unsure of himself, and it was eating away at him.

But the deck felt heavy. And a little cold. The cards were really thick and difficult to shuffle. But he did it, with no small amount of disappointment because he was hoping for something…more. “Alright,” he said as he finished. “Now what?”

“Some people don’t like to touch the cards, but it’s necessary for me to read them,” Remus said very softly. “However if you want to lay them out—if you feel like that would benefit you more—please do.”

“I think,” Sirius said quietly as he set the deck down on the table, “you ought to. Because I…I’m not confident in myself.”

“That’s alright. You don’t need to be.” Remus’ fingertips carefully moved across the table, and Sirius held his breath, unsure if he should guide Remus’ hands to the deck or not. But it didn’t matter. He found it with a deft motion and carefully put it in front of him. “This is going to represent your past.” He laid out a card face down. “This is your present.” Another right next to it. “And your future. This is just a simple three card spread. I feel like it would be easier for you to start with just the basics. And if you still have questions, we can do a more in depth reading.”

“How erm…” Sirius stopped himself. This was no time for small talk—no time to get a bio on this person. “Never mind. I’m ready.”

Remus let out a small chuckle and reached for the first card on the left. With careful fingers, he flipped it over. The card was brightly coloured with a picture of water, some grass, and a couple of dogs which looked like they were calling out to a massive, yellow moon. Sirius watched Remus take his fingers and run them along the side of the card, then the other until he found a series of bumps.

Braille, he realised. 

“So this card which represents your past, is the moon. And it’s upright. It tells me that in your past, you’ve struggled with yourself, your identity, who you are. You’ve felt deceived and possibly like you struggled to find your identity.”

Sirius felt his entire face go hot and tingly. It was so spot on, his throat actually went a bit tight.

“This could indicate struggles in your past sort of infecting your present or your future.”

“I…yeah. Okay,” Sirius said, his tone a bit hoarse.

Remus’ brow dipped and his fingers hovered over the second card, but he didn’t touch it. “Are you alright to continue?”

“I am. Yeah. Go on.”

Remus nodded, then flipped the second card. It was a black-cloaked figure holding a scythe, with the head of a skull, riding sat on a white horse. But the card was upside down to the other beside it. Remus’ fingers drifted out, feeling along the sides.

“And this one is death. But it’s inverted.”

Sirius sucked in his breath. “Death? What…I mean…is that…”

“It’s alright, Sirius. Calm down,” he said with a careful smile. “Death isn’t _death_. Death reflects change in life. Inverted death in the present means that you’re standing on the edge of change, but you’re resisting. Possibly some major decision you need to make regarding your life or the people in it—I’m not sure. And something is making you hold back.”

Sirius felt his heart speed up and he was shaking now. “I…can we…Remus.”

Remus immediately dropped his hand to Sirius’ thigh and squeezed. “Hey. Hey it’s alright. You want to stop?”

“No I,” Sirius hesitated, his voice sounding more choked than he meant it to. “Just bloody hell, mate. This is a little frightening.”

“It’s not me,” Remus said carefully. “The cards are talking to you, through me. Only because I’ve spent my life learning to read them and interpret them. But you’re the one who presented the questions and drew the answers.”

“Right,” Sirius said, focusing on the feel of Remus’ hand squeezing his thigh. He drew himself away from the situation and looked at Remus properly, and was overwhelmed suddenly by him. He was attractive and so calm, almost serene. And the look on his face told Sirius he genuinely cared about Sirius’ distress and he didn’t even _know_ him. Sirius understood now why Lily had sent him here instead of to just anyone off the street. Remus was someone he could hear this from.

“Sirius?”

Sirius realised that Remus needed verbal confirmation that everything was fine, and he swallowed. “I’m good. I promise. I’m alright. We can carry on.”

Remus’ hand tightened on his. “You sure? We don’t have to.”

“No. No I need to know.” Sirius cleared his throat and then laid his hand down on top of Remus’. As much as he had trouble with people touching him, he also rarely initiated contact with other people. But it felt so comfortable, which flooded him with shame and insecurity because who was he, getting all moony over some random bloke he didn’t know. 

“Okay.” Remus squeezed him once more, then waited until Sirius drew his hand away to flip the third card.

It was the same as the Moon had been, showing a naked woman pouring water into a stream, and above her a bright, shining star. Remus’ fingers felt out, found the braille, then smiled broadly. “Ah. The star.”

Sirius blinked, then laughed. “Like me.”

Remus chuckled. “Indeed. This is upright, and for the future—if you carry on with what you know in your heart you want, good things are waiting for you. The upright star represents renewed hope and faith. It means you’re blessed by the universe, and that you’ve been through a tough time, but you’ve come out if it stronger and better.”

Sirius felt his entire body sag with relief, a shudder going through him. “Really?”

“Yes,” Remus said, his grin broad and happy, lighting up his face. “Really. Whatever it is you know you should do, do it. The world awaits.”

Sirius scrubbed at his face, then let out a very watery laugh. “I…I honestly didn’t think this was going to tell me anything. I was just trying to humour Lily and… and. Fuck. Sorry, for swearing.”

Remus chuckled, then reached out and squeezed his shoulder. “We’re all in a position like yours, feeling lost and not sure which direction to go in. It’s okay to look other places for answers, you know. You don’t have to rely on yourself all the time.”

Sirius sat back, letting himself calm down a bit. “Do your mates abuse the privilege of having you round, making them do this a lot?”

Remus snorted. “You assume I have a lot of friends. The people I keep around me respect me for what I do. But they also get special privileges.”

Sirius felt his face flush because for a second, just a flash, he thought maybe Remus was flirting with him. Which was stupid. He was being paid for this, paid to make Sirius feel better. “Well lucky them. Not just because this was amazing, but because you’re…really good. You are. I swear I thought I was going to go mental but I feel really comfortable.”

“I’m glad. Honestly I don’t always have a strong rapport with my clients but I can tell you’re a good sort. Who’s been through a lot. And not just because of your cards.”

Sirius felt his face heat up. “That obvious, am I?”

“You hold a lot of tension in your body and you don’t trust readily.”

“Hm, most people don’t these days though, do they? I mean, how many people do you?” Sirius challenged, feeling a bit like he was under a microscope.

Remus chuckled. “Everyone. Daily. I don’t have a choice if I go out on my own. I’m forced to trust that someone is giving me the right change if I’m paying in cash. I have to trust that someone isn’t walking me into traffic, is giving me the right directions to doors and shops and the bus and the tube. I’m deceived a lot, but I don’t really have a choice.”

Sirius felt a sort of cascading fear at the thought he would ever be put into that position. Because he’d been hurt too much, and having to rely on anyone for anything… He swallowed, feeling a bit ill. “That’s rubbish.”

Remus laughed. “It can be.” He hesitated, then reached out and squeezed Sirius’ leg again. “Would you like a cup of tea?”

Sirius’ mouth opened. His session was long over, and he knew he ought to go. This was a bad idea, even if Remus was chatting him up. Sirius still had a lot to do, even if his decision was made. Even if things actually felt okay. “I should erm…I should. Go.”

There was a flash of disappointment on Remus’ face, but he smiled anyway. “Alright. I don’t have another client for a while, so I should go spend time with my baby.”

Sirius’ eyes went wide. “Your…that’s your baby? Out there?”

“Ah yes. Nym and I had Teddy about six weeks ago. It’s all very…new.” Remus chuckled and the sick feeling in his gut returned because he was with someone? How had Sirius read him so wrong. 

“Yeah, I heard babies can do that,” Sirius listened to himself say. “My godson—Lily’s you know—he’s a handful. How erm…how long have you two been together?”

Remus coughed and laughed at the same time. “Oh. Oh no, no she’s…we’re not. No. Teddy’s the only thing we share.”

Sirius felt relief hit him like a tonne of bricks and he barked a laugh. “Oh. Sorry, I just assumed.”

“It’s fine.” Remus squeezed his knee, then rose. “I enjoyed meeting you, Sirius. Very much.”

Sirius swallowed. “Same. I…should I pay you or…?”

“Lily took care of it. And any time you want to come in, please do. It would be a pleasure to see you again.” Remus extended out his hand, and when Sirius took it, he was drawn in for a hug, a faint, light kiss pressed to his cheek which left him rather speechless for several moments.

“Er. Yeah. Ab—absolutely,” he stuttered.

Remus grinned and Sirius hurried out of the shop. He passed by Nym, who was near the sofa changing a nappy, and she looked up as Sirius was finished. “Oh if you can hang on just a second, and I can take payment.”

Sirius frowned. “Remus said Lily had taken care of it?”

“Oh.” She paused, then her eyebrows went up. “Right yes, sorry. Of course. You take care.”

Sirius nodded and hurried out, feeling better than he had in months.

*** 

It was almost sunset when Sirius rang up Lily to thank her for the session. He’d done everything he needed to do, and although he was shaking from nerves after speaking to his mother for the first time in years, he also felt more brave and stronger than he ever had.

“Hi darling,” Lily said by way of answer.

“I don’t have long. Heading for a drink, but I just wanted to say thanks for the erm…you know…”

“Got your answers, did you?” she asked.

Sirius rolled his eyes, stopping by the side of a bank building, and leant his head back against the cold stone. “I did. It was…weird. But Remus was really great.”

“Isn’t he? Was Tonks there? Did she have Teddy with her?” Lily asked in a high voice.

“I don’t know what any of those words mean,” Sirius replied with a sigh.

“Tonks. The one with pink hair, and their baby?” Lily said.

“Oh. Yeah, right. Yeah she was there in the front. I didn’t really get a chance to meet them properly though.”

“Uhg their baby is so cute. It makes me want like five more.”

Sirius groaned. “Lils, you are a monster when you’re up the duff. Please spare us.”

“James said the same thing,” she grumbled. “If I didn’t actually hate being pregnant so much, I’d have a dozen more to spite you both.”

Sirius snorted. “Whatever you say, darling. Anyway, so a double thanks is in order.”

“Double? That’s generous of you.”

“Well, not only getting me there but pay for the whole session was…”

“Sirius,” Lily interrupted. “I didn’t pay for anything! Tell me you didn’t stiff poor Remus!”

“I…what?” he asked. “No he said…he said you paid for it,” he defended loudly, standing up straight. “I tried and he said you had taken care of it.”

“I…” Lily paused. “Oh. _Oh._ ”

“Oh what?” Sirius pressed.

“No nothing I. Never mind. Yes I paid for it.”

“You are the worst liar,” Sirius admonished. “What oh?”

“He just…he might. What did you think of him?”

Sirius’ eyes narrowed in suspicion. “No, I’m not playing this game. Tell me what you’re on about right now.”

“He might just fancy you a little is all. It’s no big deal,” Lily said in a rush. “Just don’t do anything…”

But Sirius mashed the end button and suddenly he was running the opposite direction toward the shop. He had no idea when it closed and he said nineteen prayers to every god he could think of as he tore through the end-of-day London crowds. Rushing up the street, he felt an ache behind his ribs but somehow managed to make it back to Remus’ shop and came to a skidding halt just beside the door.

The lights were low inside, and he couldn’t make anything out beyond the dirty fog. He sucked in a breath, touched the handle, and yanked it open.

Remus was there inside, at the desk. He looked startled when the bell jangled, and he half-rose. “I’m sorry. We’re closed.”

“No I…Remus,” Sirius said.

Remus frowned. “Yes?”

“It’s…it’s me. It’s Sirius.”

Immediately Remus’ face softened and he relaxed back into his chair. “Oh. I wasn’t expecting you back so soon,” he added with a chuckle. “Everything alright? You sound out of breath.”

“I…I ran,” Sirius said, realising he was gasping for air. He let the door close and leant against it. “I wasn’t sure what time you closed.”

Remus’ hand went to his wrist, his fingers popping the top off a watch, and his fingers went round it. “Ten minutes ago, it seems. Mind flicking on the closed sign and turning the lock?”

“With erm. Me on this side of the door?” Sirius asked.

Remus chuckled. “Absolutely.”

Sirius quickly did as he was told, then he took a hesitant step inside the room. “Erm. I was wondering if maybe that offer of tea was still open?”

Remus looked just a little surprised, but grinned. “Absolutely. Come on, we can go into the back room.”

He followed the other man back through the reading room, into a separate area which looked a lot like a bedsit. There was a small kitchen, which opened directly to a lounge with a squashy sofa, telly in the corner, and a couple of bookshelves. A small door led to the toilet, and beside that a broom cupboard which was half-open and stocked with cleaning supplies.

“Do you erm,” Sirius asked as Remus went to flick on the kettle, “do you live here?”

Remus turned slightly, and chuckled. “No. When Nym and I saw this place for let, it was a consideration that if either of us needed it, we could. But no I’ve a flat nearby.”

“I think that sounded more snobby than I intended. I just didn’t want to invite myself into your home all…willy nilly,” Sirius said, feeling ridiculous and awkward.

Remus’ smile was soft, and he nodded in the direction of the sofa. “Go on and sit. You want milk or sugar?”

“Black is fine, thank you,” he replied absently as he lowered himself onto a cushion. It was cosy, and the small space kept warm fairly well. He felt comfortable there, and then almost laughed at himself at how silly he felt about this whole thing. What the hell was he doing?

Remus walked over though, slow deliberate steps with one mug held out. “What side are you on?”

“Oh erm.” Sirius reached out to take the mug. “On your left.”

Remus smiled and took the cushion next to him. “So, are you doing alright? You seemed a little flustered when you left?”

“I’m good. I am. I…I was able to sort out the things I meant to. With your help,” Sirius said quietly, then took a sip of the tea. “Phoned Lily to say thanks for the reading.”

At that, Remus’ cheeks blushed bright, and he tipped his head down. “Ah. Right. Sold me out, did she?”

“Actually Nym nearly did,” Sirius said. “Got a bit shirty with me when I tried to leave without paying.”

Remus let out a tight chuckle. “Yeah. Heard about that after you were gone.”

“You shouldn’t have,” Sirius said. “I don’t…I don’t nee charity.”

“It wasn’t,” Remus said very softly. He gripped his mug tight enough to turn his knuckles white. “You were struggling and I wanted you to focus on what the reading gave you, not the fact that it was a paid service. It’s…” Remus sat back, letting out a sigh. “It’s not magic, you know. It’s not some silly, wand-waving nonsense. Every one of us is born with the inherent ability to feel and understand our path. But the world cooks it out of us, the ability to see and feel it. We’re bombarded with so much negativity and anger and pain that we just…get lost.”

Sirius let out a shaking breath. “Yeah, I understand that.”

“Think about it. You were born with a map—a literal map—of your life on your hands. A map which can guide you through your present and your future. It can prepare you for what’s coming, and it’s all right there, right in the open. You needed that moment, Sirius. And that’s why I do this. Yes, it’s my job and I need to make a living, but I’m not going broke because of this one thing.”

Sirius swallowed thickly. “Could you erm…could you look one more time? At my palm?”

Remus chuckled and set his tea down, holding out his hands. Sirius gave his over, and felt a shiver run through him as Remus’ thumb dipped hard into his lines and began to trace them. “You experienced a rebirth,” he said softly. “Here. There’s a break. And you’re incredibly logical, but you have a strong heart and when you let your emotions guide you, you do alright.”

Sirius laughed. “That’s one way of looking at it.”

“There are many ways to see things, Sirius,” Remus replied quietly, still holding on tight. “You’re beautiful and deserving—whatever it is you wanted.”

Sirius let out a long breath through his nose. “I’m…I’m a trans man.” He paused, but Remus gave no more reaction other than to give his fingers a gentle squeeze. “I told my little brother when I was nine that I wasn’t a girl. He was a bit of a git, but he kept my secret. I told James when I was eleven, and my headmaster shortly after. When my parents learnt I was in the boys’ dormitory, it was…there was…” he let out another breath. “It was a struggle for years, and eventually they chucked me out. James’ mum and dad took me in and I did alright on my own. Went off to University, got a good job. But my mum is dying.”

“Oh, Sirius…”

“She’s coming to terms with it. My little brother fucked off from the family a few years after I did. Found his courage, thank god. She couldn’t reach Reg, so she rang me up and told me she wanted to leave the family business and the entire Black Family estate to me. I’d be rich. And head up a major corporation and never have to worry about anything again.”

“I’m sensing there was a catch,” Remus said very quietly.

“On paper she wanted me to go by my dead name and the wrong gender,” Sirius said. “She went on about how she didn’t care what public face I used because she wouldn’t be alive to be shamed by it. But that if my family truly meant anything to me, I’d accept this under an identity of someone I’m not.”

“It’s not my place,” Remus said, his voice tight, “but I hope you told her no.”

Sirius let out a bitter laugh. “I considered it. I did. I thought well, would it really matter if it was just on paper? I could be set for life and who was it hurting?” He used his free hand to rub his face. “Turns out it was hurting me. Because it was her last bit of revenge, to sink her claws into me and get me to bend to her will. It didn’t matter who _I_ was to her. It only mattered who she wanted me to be. So I told her no. She’ll likely donate all the money to some hate organisation but I can sleep at night knowing I did what was right by me.”

Remus squeezed him so tight. “I’m proud of you.”

Sirius let out a watery laugh and shook his head. “You don’t even know me.”

“I think that’s okay,” Remus said with a shrug. “I don’t need to know you intimately to be so proud of you. I think you’re…quite wonderful.”

“You say that to all the cute blokes?” Sirius joked.

Remus’ fingers tensed. “No. I don’t.”

There was a moment of tension—not the bad sort, but Sirius could feel it intensely all the same. “Can I erm…can I do your palm?”

Remus’ eyebrows shot up, and he let out a laugh. “Alright. Go on.”

Sirius turned Remus’ palm and used his index finger to trace all the lines. There were branches and forks and his entire palm was covered in them. “Well it says here that er…one London night when it was supposed to rain but the weather never quite got round to it, a client would come bursting back into your shop for a cup of tea under the pretence of chatting—but in truth, it’s because he’d spent less than an hour with you and has fallen head over heels. He doesn’t understand it, but your erm…your line that tells you about fateful encounters, says your life will be fraught with misery if you don’t give this bloke a chance.”

Remus’ smile was intense and so vivid. “Is that so?”

Sirius nodded. “It is.”

“Well I have to say, Sirius, your palmistry skills are absolute and utter shite.”

Sirius barked a delighted, bright laugh. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Remus turned his hand, closing his fingers round Sirius’ wrist, and tugged him closer. “But I think it’s good advice.”

“Do you?” Sirius murmured as Remus’ face came so close they were nearly touching. He felt bold now, pushing his nose against Remus’ and nuzzling it.

“I do,” Remus said quietly. “I also think you ought to kiss me. Since that’s what star-crossed lovers do.”

“Ah. Good thing I have you to guide me,” Sirius said just before he turned his head and captured Remus in a slow, heated kiss. Their tongues met, brushing together soft and warm, and Sirius felt a small moan escape.

Remus’ hand went up to cup Sirius’ cheek just as Sirius’ hands came to grip round Remus’ ribs and they were chest-to-chest, breathing heavy and wanting. When they finally broke apart, Remus pushed his forehead against Sirius’. “So.”

Sirius chuckled. “So, indeed.”

“I think we might have something here.”

“I’m inclined to agree.” Remus gave soft, gentle kisses across Sirius’ cheeks. “If I asked you to stay…?”

Sirius breathed him in before he answered. “I would absolutely say yes.”

**Author's Note:**

> Side note to my readers- I've stopped replying to comments unless it's a direct question. I appreciate all your critique and comments, but regarding critique--I'm doing this for fun and I will try my absolute hardest to approach each fic topic with respect, but the more I deal with critique, the more this feels like a job, and I've no intention of treating fanfic as anything more than a hobby. If it feels like work, I won't want to do it anymore. And I really enjoy writing for the fandom. So even if there's a grammar issue, or if I've not used the correct wording regarding a piercing or tattoo or job or something--you're welcome to tell me, but don't expect a response. (however if I've portrayed something incorrect about gender, race, or sexuality, please please come to me and let me know because those are absolutely 100% exceptions and I will immediately correct where I've gone wrong.)


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